"The cardinal difficulty," said MacPhee, "in collaboration between the sexes is that women speak a language without nouns. If two men are doing a bit of work, one will say to the other, 'Put this bowl inside the bigger bowl which you'll find on the top shelf of the green cupboard.' The female for this is, 'Put that in the other one in there.' And then if you ask them, 'in where?' they say, 'in there, of course.' There is consequently a phatic hiatus."
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Ch. 8 : Moonlight at Belbury, section 2C. S. Lewis
[About drunks.] So, now you've got to go. So you come into the bathroom, close the door; now, don't forget: you owe this to yourself. You've worked hard all week. It's come to this: [leans on his stage chair like a toilet] "Ooooohhhhhh...eeeeehhhhh.....ahh, Jesus... Oh, God... if You get me out of this, I'll never drink again as long as I live... " Now you are ready...to put your face...in a place...that was never built for your face. "Ohhhhh!" Now you feel it coming, so you say "holding on! Holding on! We're going for a ride, yes! Bring it on, yes! Here it comes, I'm ready to explode!" [Imitates someone vomiting into a toilet.] And your muscles lock, everything! And you would not be surprised...you would not be surprised...if you saw your SHOES come out of your mouth! Now that wave has stopped, you say "Oouough!" And you put your head on the side of the bowl...and you thank the toilet bowl! "Thank you, toilet bowl. Thank you for being so cool on the side. Only you understand me, toilet bowl. You're the only friend I have. My wonderful toilet bowl."
Bill Cosby
To the "masculists" of both sexes, "femininity" implies all that men have built into the female image in the past few centuries: weakness, imbecility, dependence, masochism, unreliability, and a certain "babydoll" sexuality that is actually only a projection of male dreams. To the "feminist" of both sexes, femininity is synonymous with the eternal female principle, connoting strength, integrity, wisdom, justice, dependability, and a psychic power foreign and therefore dangerous to the plodding masculists of both sexes.
Elizabeth Gould Davis
His strange appearance made the people turn round, and this led Alexander to look at him. In astonishment he gave orders to make way for him to draw near, and asked who he was. "Dinocrates," quoth he, "a Macedonian architect, who brings thee ideas and designs worthy of thy renown. I have made a design for the shaping of Mount Athos into the statue of a man, in whose left hand I have represented a very spacious fortified city, and in his right a bowl to receive the water of all the streams which are in that mountain, so that it may pour from the bowl into the sea."
Vitruvius
When I play the South, they say "y'all" in the South. They take out the "O" and the "U". So when I'm in the South I try to talk like that so people understand me. "Hello, can I have a bowl of chicken noodle s-p? Come on, I'm in the South, you understand. I mean I'm in the S-th, and I want some s-p!" "I stubbed my toe, -ch!" "I need to lay down on the c-ch!" "I need to get the f**k -t of the S-th!"
Mitch Hedberg
His language had a special vocabulary — not just "the SF" [God] and "epsilon" [child] but also "bosses" (women), "slaves" (men), "captured" (married), "liberated" (divorced), "recaptured" (remarried), "noise" (music), "poison" (alcohol), "preaching" (giving a mathematics lecture), "Sam" (the United States), and "Joe" (the Soviet Union). When he said someone had "died," Erdős meant that the person had stopped doing mathematics. When he said someone had "left," the person had died.
Paul Erdos
Lewis, C. S.
Lewis, Carl
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