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If you are an adult, and you are planning to dress up on Halloween...don't. I will find you. I will hurt you.

 

Lewis Black

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I don't consider myself a great singer--but I have a connection with the audience. There's the artist, and then a void and the audience; but I like to be part of the audience. I'd like to be them, and I'd like them to be me for an hour and a half. I get criticized for being the antichrist, causing kids to commit suicide, but that's total bullsh-t. My intentions are not that. Every year they have Halloween, and all I do is take Halloween night out on the road every night. It's like a Halloween party every night. If that was the case on Halloween night, the police cells would be full--everyone would have turned Satanic for the night!

 

Ozzy Osbourne

 

I like Halloween, you people like Halloween? [Audience cheers] I love it, too. My brother got in trouble last Halloween for toilet-papering people's houses. He said, "Dude, I didn't know that was illegal!" I said, "It ain't, but you are supposed to use fresh toilet paper. Pull your pants up and stop pooping in those pumpkins, too! For God's sake, you're the sheriff!"

 

Larry the Cable Guy

 

It's always fun to climb into a dress when you're having a party, right? So we were having a party and I did just that, I poured myself into a dress. When I woke up - and I woke between the kitchen cabinets - I wasn't wearing the dress any longer. No idea where it went. It was a nice dress as well, a little black number. Do I look good in a dress? Always.

 

Bert McCracken

 

I began to become an adult when I was 24 and got married and had children. That matures you, but I wouldn't say I was fully an adult until I was in my forties. The trouble with the whole adult debate is that if you're asking 18-year-olds to go out and fight wars for you then you can't deny them adult rights even though in sorts of other ways they wouldn't qualify until they were about 25. These days adolescence stretches much further into adulthood than it used to. There's no longer any encouragement to be mature.

 

J. G. Ballard

 

Most people don’t think I’m rational. They’re too busy featuring their hurt. They find it irrational not to feature your hurt. That’s how f**ked up they are.

 

Frank Zappa