Robin Williams
American actor and comedian.
And if you want a linguistic adventure, go drinking with a Scotsman. Cause you can't fucking understand them before.
Now, at the airports, if you're heavily pierced, like some of my friends, it's like, (steps forward) "BZZT!" "Please remove anything from your pockets." Tip of the iceberg. (pantomimes removing various piercings from the ears, nose, eyebrows, lips; then reaches to the side, grabs an imaginary drill, points it at his crotch and makes a drilling noise) For those playing the home game, this is what's known as a Prince Albert. And I'm sure that was his last wish..."Victoria, I'm dying...I want you to name a museum, a performance hall, and a bolt through the cock after me..."
There was an old, crazy dude who used to live a long time ago. His name was Lord Buckley. And he said, a long time ago, he said, "People--they're kinda like flowers, and it's been a privilege walking in your garden." My love goes with you.
The sound crapped out for a bit, that's why I'm using SupposiSound! No one wants their tapes back, I wonder why.
They made porn movies, of my movies! Good Will Humping? Okay... Wet Dreams May Cum? All right... Snatch Adams? That was scary. A clown with a strap-on.
Unless you're passing a bowling ball, I don't think so. Unless you're trying to circumcise yourself with a chainsaw, I don't think so. Unless you're opening an umbrella up your ass, I don't think so!