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Best is water, but gold stands out blazing like fire
at night beyond haughty wealth.

 

Pindar

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Through centuries of centuries, fire and water face each other; the fire, upright, buoyant and leaping; the water flat, creeping, gliding, widening its lines and its surface. When they touch, is it the water which hisses and roars, or is it the fire?

 

Henri Barbusse

 

Even if I had all the crimes possible on my conscience, I am sure I should lose none of my confidence. Heartbroken with repentance, I would simply throw myself into my Saviour's arms, for I know how much He loves the prodigal son. I have heard what He said to Mary Magdalene, to the woman taken in adultery, and the Samaritan woman. No one can make me frightened any more, because I know what to believe about His mercy and His love; I know that in the twinkling of an eye all those thousands of sins would be consumed as a drop of water cast into a blazing fire.

 

Therese of Lisieux

 

This 'Improv' sign is all over, all the improvs have it, and in Tempe, Arizona, the sign is made out of gold. I swear to God. And the dude wasn't gonna pay me, so I stole the 'M', 'cause the 'M' seems like it weighs the most. Followed by the 'R'. Then the 'P'. The 'P' was one little thing away from being as heavy as the 'R'. So I had a gold 'M', and I asked the guy if he'd like to buy a Gold 'M'. He said "No, what the f**k do I want a gold 'M' for?" "Well how 'bout a gold 'W'?" {pause for laughter} I had a bad set here last night, and they added an 'E' to the end of the sign.

 

Mitch Hedberg

 

You know when you go into a bar and you want to wash your hands, so you go to the bathroom, and they don't have any hot water? You turn on the C knob, cold water comes out, you turn on the H knob, cold water comes out! It's like, f**k, you cheap bar! But I can accept that, but I just want to know what H stands for now! C obviously stands for "cold." H must stand for, "Ha Ha Dude! You thought this shit was hot, but it is not! Now go spread some germs!"

 

Mitch Hedberg

 

O tenderly the haughty day
Fills his blue urn with fire;
One morn is in the mighty heaven,
And one in our desire.

 

Ralph Waldo Emerson