It's such a weird thing, because I don't take it for granted, but I also don't take the monetary aspects of it too seriously. I'll still turn things down, then go, "What am I turning down? This is ridiculous!" I'll make jokes about all the money that's thrown around, but at the same time be thinking, Oh my God, what if I never work again? I can't go back to being a waitress. Twenty things like that go through your head each time. But then sometimes you just want to open up a bed-and-breakfast in some great town. Then, if you have to go back and be a waitress, you can run the bed-and-breakfast.
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On her success and popularity after the movie Speed.Sandra Bullock
» Sandra Bullock - all quotes »
I'm a lousy piece of ass, and I should know every man I have been with has told me so, I've been there almost every time. I mean, the closest thing I got to a birds and bees talk was with my dad. He was like, "Son, sex is a lot like this egg." "Dad, I think those are drugs." "Whatever, queer." "Why does everyone keep saying that?" "Listen up, son, listen good. You take a woman and crack her over the head and lie her flat. Make sure she sizzles and then flip her over. Don't stand too close or you'll get yellow stuff all over your bacon" What? I see some of you holding your stomach and feeling: "No, you shouldn't." That's a breakfast joke. That's the most important joke of the day. If you don't laugh at that, you're gonna be sleepy around 11:30. And you'll be like, "Why am I so tired?"
Daniel Tosh
I staggered into a Manchester bar late one night on a tour and the waitress said "You look as if you need a Screaming Orgasm". At the time this was the last thing on my mind...
Terry Pratchett
"I like breakfast-time better than any other moment in the day," said Mr. Irwine. "No dust has settled on one's mind then, and it presents a clear mirror to the rays of things".
George Eliot
Well, I flung the window open an' I shouted, "Yes, that's right Millandra I'm goin' to Greece for the sex; sex for breakfast, sex for dinner, sex for tea, an sex for supper." Well, she just ignored me but this little cab driver leans out an' pipes up, "That sounds like a marvellous diet, love." "It is," I shouted back, "have y' never heard of it? It's called the 'F' Plan."
Willy Russell
We throw sticks at dogs, that's the level we have dogs at. You'd never dream of throwing one for a cat. We throw sticks for dogs, and dogs go, "Oh, he's dropped his stick! I better go and get that. [mimes chasing after the stick] Saw you dropped your stick there, thought I'd bring it back. And you hang on! [mimes giving the stick back and follows it with eyes as it's thrown again] Did you see me just bring that back? And then you you dropped it again? This is very weird. I don't know what's going on here. [mimes bringing the stick back again] Now, hang on to it this time, I don't want to piss about all the time. You think I enjoy this? There you don't f**king throw it!" That's why the third time, when they come back, they won't give it to you. They go, [through clenched teeth] "No I won't let you take it!"
Eddie Izzard
Bullock, Sandra
Bultmann, Rudolf
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