Monday, December 23, 2024 Text is available under the CC BY-SA 3.0 licence.

Margaret Cho

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I was in the airport and there were these big snowboarder guys and they had white masks around their necks, and as soon as they saw me, they put their masks on. So I just went, "*cough, cough, cough* You wanna egg rorr?"

 
Margaret Cho

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The worst kind of non-smoker is the one when you're smoking and they just walk up to you [mocks a person faking a cough] I always say 'shit, you're lucky you don't smoke. That's a hell of a cough you got there. I smoke all day and don't cough like that. Maybe you were conceived with a weak sperm or somethin'. Maybe your dad was jackin' off and your mom sat on it at the last second.' Did I overreact? I don't think I did. I think that's kind of cruel, I'm smoking and you come up coughing at me, Jesus. Do you go up to crippled people and start dancing too, you f**k? [starts dancing] Hey Mr. Wheelchair, what's your problem? C'mon iron-side, race ya. F**kin' sadists. I mean the nerve!

 
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(after coughing) ...and then you cough and die.

 
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Love and a cough cannot be hid.

 
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I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]

 
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All shuffle there; all cough in ink;
All wear the carpet with their shoes;
All think what other people think;
All know the man their neighbour knows.
Lord, what would they say
Did their Catullus walk that way?

 
William Butler Yeats
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