I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand,
Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain.
He was looking for a place called Le Ho Fooks.
Gonna get a big dish of beef chow mein.
--
Werewolves of London, written by Warren Zevon, LeRoy Marinell, and Waddy Wachtel
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Voted best opening line of all time in a BBC radio pollWarren Zevon
The erasure of a human subspecies is largely painless — to us — if we know little enough about it. A dead Chinaman is of little import to us whose awareness of things Chinese is bounded by an occasional dish of chow mein. We grieve only for what we know. The erasure of Silphium from western Dane County is no cause for grief if one knows it only as a name in a botany book.
Aldo Leopold
Bognor has always meant to me the quintessential English seaside experience (before all this global warming stuff): driving in the rain to get there, walking around in the rain looking for something to do when you're there, and driving home in the rain again...
Terry Pratchett
"We know a little place in the American Far West, where Charlie Briggs chops up the finest prairie-fed beef and tastes..." (pauses, and continues with a note of disgust in his voice) This is a lot of shit, you know that! You want one more? One more on the beef?
Orson Welles
Chinese cultural influence is virtually nil, and unlikely to increase… Indeed, high Chinese culture and art are almost all imitative of western forms: Chinese concert pianists are technically brilliant, but brilliant at Schubert and Rachmaninov. Chinese ballerinas dance to the scores of Diaghilev. The number of Chinese Nobel prizes won on home turf is zero, although there are of course legions of bright Chinese trying to escape to Stanford and Caltech… It is hard to think of a single Chinese sport at the Olympics, compared with umpteen invented by Britain, including ping-pong, I’ll have you know, which originated at upper-class dinner tables and was first called whiff-whaff. The Chinese have a script so fiendishly complicated that they cannot produce a proper keyboard for it.
Boris Johnson
I hope God speaks English. If I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed.
Daniel Tosh
Zevon, Warren
Zhdanov, Andrei
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