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Jack Benny

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Jack: [Pointing to the tiger] He must have gone to a veterinarian in Denmark.

 
Jack Benny

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Jack: What kind of tiger is that - Siberian or Bengal?

 
Jack Benny
 

I said: "A tiger does not proclaim his tigritude, he pounces". In other words: a tiger does not stand in the forest and say: "I am a tiger". When you pass where the tiger has walked before, you see the skeleton of the duiker, you know that some tigritude has been emanated there.

 
Wole Soyinka
 

Jack: [pointing a pistol at Bob's trousers] I'm going to blow your brains out.

 
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Chinese medicine, oh, Chinese medicine! "But there are billions of Chinese, Chinese medicine must be working." Here's the skinny on Chinese medicine. A hundred years ago the average life expectancy in China was 30. The life expectancy in China at the moment is 73. And it's not feckin' tiger penis that turned it around for the Chinese. Didn't do much for the tiger, if you don't mind me pointing out.

 
Dara O Briain
 

That tiger ain't go crazy; that tiger went tiger! You know when he was really crazy? When he was riding around on a unicycle with a Hitler helmet on!

 
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