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Donald Trump has been uncommonly nice to Hillary and me. We’re all New Yorkers. And I like him. And I love playing golf with him.
--
Bill Clinton, June 4, 2012.

 

Donald Trump

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Donald Trump (clip): I have people that actually have been studying it and they cannot believe what they're finding.
Meredith Vieira (clip): You have people now, down there searching—
Trump (clip): Absolutely.
Vieira (clip): I mean, in Hawaii?
Trump (clip): Absolutely. And they cannot believe what they're finding.
Wolf Blitzer: All right, tell us what your people who were investigating in Hawaii, what they found.
Trump: Oh, we don't have to go into old news. That's old news.
Blitzer: Well, what did they find?
Trump: There's been plenty found. You can call many people. You can read many, many articles on the authenticity of the certificate. You can read many articles from just recently as to what the publisher printed in a brochure as to what Obama told him, as to where his place of birth is. And that's fine, Wolf.

 

Donald Trump

 

Wolf Blitzer: Donald, you're beginning to sound a little ridiculous, I have to tell you.
Donald Trump: No I think you are, Wolf. Now let me tell you something, I think you sound ridiculous, and if you'd ask me a question and let me answer it —
Blitzer: Here's the question, did the conspiracy start in 1961 where the Honolulu Star-Bulletin and the Honolulu Advertiser contemporaneously published announcements that he was born in Hawaii?
Trump: That's right. That's right. And many people put those announcements in because they wanted to get the benefit because of getting so-called born in this country. Many people did it. It was something that was done by many people even though they weren't born in the country. You know and so do I... And so do a lot of your viewers. Although you don't have too many viewers.

 

Donald Trump

 

The cost of appearing with a bloviating ignoramus is obvious, it seems to me. Donald Trump is redundant evidence that if your net worth is high enough, your IQ can be very low and you can still intrude into American politics.

 

Donald Trump

 

Donald Trump and producer Mark Burnett are reportedly considering creating a Broadway musical based on The Apprentice. The pair came up with the idea when neither one of them could find a match to set fire to a pile of money.

 

Amy Poehler

 

One day Donald Trump discovers that he is owned, lock, stock, and roulette wheel, by Lutheran Brotherhood, and must renegotiate his debt load with a committee of silent Norwegians who don't understand why anyone would pay more than $120 for a suit.

 

Garrison Keillor