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I know, you want to make a citizen's arrest of anyone whose menu lists "Idaho potato baked in it's skin," but you can't.
--
Alphabet Juice (2008), p. 155

 

Roy Blount

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Since it's not considered polite, and surely not politically-correct to come out and actually say that greed gets wonderful things done, let me go through a few of the millions of examples of the benefits of people trying to get more for themselves. There's probably widespread agreement that it's a wonderful thing that most of us own cars. Is there anyone who believes that the reason we have cars is because Detroit assembly line workers care about us? It's also wonderful that Texas cattle ranchers make the sacrifices of time and effort caring for steer so that New Yorkers can have beef on their supermarket shelves. It is also wonderful that Idaho potato growers arise early to do back-breaking work in the hot sun to ensure that New Yorkers also have potatoes on their supermarket shelves. Again, is there anyone who believes that ranchers and potato growers, who make these sacrifices, do so because they care about New Yorkers? They might hate New Yorkers. New Yorkers have beef and potatoes because Texas cattle ranchers and Idaho potato growers care about themselves and they want more for themselves. How much steak and potatoes would New Yorkers have if it all depended on human love and kindness? I would feel sorry for New Yorkers. Thinking this way bothers some people because they are more concerned with the motives behind a set of actions rather than the results. This is what Adam Smith, the father of economics, meant in The Wealth of Nations when he said, "It is not from the benevolence of the butcher, the brewer, or the baker, that we expect our dinner, but from their regard to their own interests."

 

Walter E. Williams

 

When Ron Paul said inflation was the hidden tax, I yelled at the screen, "He's right! Follow up: This is a key comment!" Instead the moderator, other candidates, and the crowd just stared at him and probably just wanted a baked potato with their cheese burger.

 

Ron Paul

 

While at a Cabinet retreat in Fiji the menu for the day was explained, "You can get Chinese food all day, however if you want anything else you'll have to make a specific order." Lange quipped, "So it's Wok around the clock?"

 

David Lange

 

"Monkfish liver! Can you sell them? How many people order them?" one chef will say. "I herda them," says another. "The f**king burger…" groans another, "I can’t get it off the menu. I tried, but they scream." "Give them the damn burger," says another, "and f**king salmon if they want it too. Just slip them the good stuff slowly, when they're not looking. A little here,a little there, as a special. Choke them with burgers but slide them tuna rare. Give them their salmon, but make it ceviche. They’ll come around. They’re coming around."

 

Anthony Bourdain

 

"Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me."

 

Cassandra Clare