We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.
Kurt Vonnegut
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This Earle of Oxford, making of his low obeisance to Queen Elizabeth, happened to let a Fart, at which he was so abashed and ashamed that he went to Travell, 7 yeares. On his returne the Queen welcomed him home, and sayd, My Lord, I had forgott the Fart.
John Aubrey
Riding the crest, I diversified, exploiting a highly marketable capacity to fart at will... By mastering this skill I set myself on a par with those court jesters of old who could wow the monarch and all his retinue with a simultaneous leap, whistle and fart. Unable to extend my neo-Homeric story-telling activities from the playground to the classroom, I could nevertheless continue to hog the limelight by interpolating a gaseous running commentary while the teacher addressed himself to the blackboard.
Clive James
Art is like a fart for the soul. Better out than in.
Martin Firrell
Nothing will wilt spinach like an Egyptian fart.
Bill Allred
I’m a fart in a gale of wind, a humble violet, under a cow pat.
Djuna Barnes
Vonnegut, Kurt
Voroshilov, Kliment
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