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The Paradox of Our Time is one of many stories that has been forwarded around the internet and attributed to Carlin, but is actually by Bob Moorehead.
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"Don't Blame Me". Georgecarlin.com (official website). Retrieved on 2012-09-09.
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"snopes.com: The Paradox of Our Time". Snopes.com. Retrieved on 2012-09-09.

 

George Carlin

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I am a Bad American is another mass-forwarded internet message often attributed to George Carlin, but was not written by him.

 

George Carlin

 

"George Carlin is now in hell, and it is not relevant that George Carlin boasted that he does not believe in hell when he lived on Earth. Be assured, Carlin believes in hell now... George Carlin, the filthy blasphemer, the obscene potty-mouth skeptic, agnostic and profane atheist, who had nothing but disdain for the God and the Bible all the days of his tragic life, is now at this minute and forever writhing and screaming in exquisite pain, pleading for mercy from that God he flipped off while performing for HBO lucre... When Carlin died, June 22nd, he split hell wide open...Hell from below was moved beneath thee at thy coming, it stirreth up the dead for thee. Are thou as weak as we George Carlin?! The worm is spread under thee and the worm covers thee.George Carlin is in hell. Deal with it. You will soon join him there. America is doomed. We will picket George Carlin's funeral..Amen!"**

 

Fred Phelps

 

Irony is a form of paradox. Paradox is what is good and great at the same time.

 

Friedrich Schlegel

 

The internet's completely over. [...] The internet's like MTV. At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated. Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can't be good for you.

 

Prince (musician)

 

There is nothing so new in Christianity that it may not appear to have been in the world before, and yet everything is new. Now, if someone uses the name of Christianity and Christ’s name, but the categories are anything but Christian, is this, then Christianity? The mark of Christianity is the paradox, the absolute paradox. As soon as a so called speculative cancels the paradox and makes this qualification into an element, all the spheres are confused.

 

Soren Aabye Kierkegaard