Mignon McLaughlin (1913 – 1983)
American journalist and author.
If I knew what I was so anxious about, I wouldn't be so anxious.
The ideal home: big enough for you to hear the children, but not very well.
A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles.
I'm glad I don't have to explain to a man from Mars why each day I set fire to dozens of little pieces of paper, and then put them in my mouth.
We all become great explorers during our first few days in a new city, or a new love affair.
A young woman can live off the folly of men; a man of any age can live off the folly of women.
If he suddenly falls in love with someone else, a husband may not start wanting a divorce; but if he suddenly makes a lot of money, he usually will.
At the beginning of a love affair, not even the neurotic is neurotic.
An attractive woman likes feminine company until she's twenty, and after she's twenty-five.
Character is what emerges from all the little things you were too busy to do yesterday, but did anyway.
Life's most painful condition: to be almost a celebrity.
Many beautiful women have been made happy by their own beauty, but no intelligent woman has ever been made happy by her own intelligence.
Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to weave.
Bored with your present enemies? Make new ones! Tell two of your women friends that they look alike.
Women are good listeners, but it’s a waste of time telling your troubles to a man unless there’s something specific you want him to do.
No one has ever loved anyone the way everyone wants to be loved.
All love is probationary, a fact which frightens women and exhilarates men.
Neurosis is no worse than a bad cold; you ache all over, and it's made you a mess, but you won't die from it.
On stage and off, we care what happens to a beautiful woman, whether she can act well or not.
Neurotic: someone who can go from the bottom to the top, and back again, without ever once touching the middle.