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This is what he said, "When I have sex,
I'm always thinkin' 'bout the pavement
So I can avoid premature ejaculation."
I got up remembering to thank him
Better things to do, so I'll start drinkin' now

 

Modest Mouse

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So I seen chickens, started spittin'
Got me thinkin', "Should I let her ride the dick tonight?"
F**k that, put her in the back
Let her yap 'cause she know I'm 'bout to lay the pipe
Start buggin' when I'm clubbin'
Do I really need the hooker hangin' by my side?
Pulled over; shit, I f**ked her quick
Then kicked her out my ride

 

Eamon (singer)

 

I wish someone would just start Fly At Your Own Risk Airlines. How 'bout that? You can have your hair gel, you can have your lighter, you can have a f**king gun, how bout that? You can show up at the gate five minutes before the plane leaves, and pay in cash, like in the good ol' 1980s. The ticket just says "shit happens" on the back, because that's the way it is anyway.

 

Bill Maher

 

One tortured soul I know who suffers from amazingly premature ejaculation -- I mean so premature that he hasn't got any children after eleven years of marriage -- was told by the priest that it was probably a blessing in disguise. What a piece of advice to give to a poor sod who comes off at the sound of his wife's car in the drive.

 

Tom Baker

 

The last time I freaked out I just kept looking down.
I st-st-stuttered when you asked me what I'm thinkin' 'bout.
Felt like I couldn't breathe, you asked what's wrong with me.
My best friend Lesley says "Oh, she's just being Miley."

 

Miley Cyrus

 

I think us here to wonder, myself. To wonder. To ast. And that in wondering bout the big things and asting bout the big things, you learn about the little ones, almost by accident. But you never know nothing more about the big things than you start out with. The more I wonder, he say, the more I love.

 

Alice Walker