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Jeff Foxworthy

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My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!

 
Jeff Foxworthy

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(About valet parking in Atlanta) He jumped out of his truck and he gets militant. And he jumps in front of my Range Rover and puts his hands on the hood and he goes "Nobody parks their own car in this parking lot, I park the cars in this parking lot!" Well, I rolled down my window and very politely said, "Get out my f**king way!"

 
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The best driver in Grand Prix racing, the best driver in the world by a long way.

 
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Living with Grandma had taught Elizabeth the basic rules. At Grandma’s she had learned that you were either a giver or a taker, predator or prey. And Cassidy Shaw had all the hallmarks of prey

 
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Cindy (Chris Farley): That reminds me, I have a joke: I heard Michael Jackson went shopping at K-Mart because there was a sale! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Christy (Spade): You messed it up, dumbbell! He went shopping at K-Mart because he heard little boys' pants were half off.

 
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I was the driver's mate, delivering the bottles and beer around South Yorkshire. We used to have a pint at every stop – well the driver's mate did, not the driver, thankfully – and we used to have about 10 stops in a day. You worked so hard you didn't feel you'd drunk 10 pints by four o'clock, you used to sweat so much. But then you had to lift all the empties off the lorry. It's probably horrifying but we used to do that then go home for tea and then go out in the evening to the pub.

 
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