Garner: Before we get off the electoral process, they wanted me to run for Governor [of California] about 8 years ago--ahem--and I didn't want to do it. I wasn't gonna get in with that--
Tavis Smiley: Now you wish you had.
Garner: No, no, no.
Tavis Smiley: Hey, Arnold [Schwarzenegger] won.
Garner: No. I think I could have won easy, but I don't think that they ought to have somebody like me or Schwarzenegger as Governor. It's no way to run a state.James Garner
I had a truly horrible dream last night … [Arnold Schwarzenegger, Mike Tyson and I] were on our way to a TV studio for a debate about his long-time working friendship with the powerful Bush family from Texas and how it might affect the next Bush presidency when The Terminator seizes power in Sacramento and tries to hand over the state's 54 electoral votes by election day in 2004. That is the basic plan behind Schwarzenegger running. He doesn't want to be Governor, he just wants the electoral votes to go to Bush this time.
Hunter S. Thompson
Arnold Schwarzenegger is the governor of your state. How can I, as a comedian, create a reality that encompasses that?
Lewis Black
Arnold Schwarzenegger is the governor of California. There's a perfectly ordinary English sentence. How did that happen!? Do you know how that happened? 'Cause I'll tell you. Do you know how he got into that position? He got there... by lifting things. Now, you and me, we avoid lifting things; It's unpleasant. Especially heavy things. Even a five-year-old child knows this. He'll go "No, ha ha, f**k it, no, I'll go and stick Lego up my arse, I'm not doing that, no no." He took a different approach. He lifted the heavy- and you know, you lift something if you have to. Piano falls on granny, you lift the piano… 'cause Granny has mixed feelings about the whole situation. Sunday lunch continues. He didn't do any of that. He went over to the heavy thing, and lifted it, and put it back down and didn't move it anywhere... and then he did it again, hundreds of times, and he said to people who stopped to observe this aberrant behaviour, "Look how good I am... at lifting the heavy thing, in my underpants." Now that may seem a little dim. But it was they who said "You're the man. You're the one we want to deal with immigration, and water rates, and taxes, and all that kinda shit." But wait—what we need to know is, how bad was his predecessor at that job? This must've been someone who came to work covered in children's blood every morning.
Dylan Moran
They should cut Joel Garner off at the knees to make him bowl at a normal height.
Geoff Boycott
Garner, James
Garner, John Nance
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