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After initially trying to defend his remarks about gun-toting, tabacky-chewing, bitter Jesus freaks, Barack Obama is now backpedaling furiously.
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April 12, 2008

 

Charles Foster Johnson

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[in South Africa] Barack Obama! A black man! With a black name! I know that ain't that black here, but in America that's about as black as a name could get. Barack Obama! That's right next to Dikembe Mutombo. That's right. Barack, man, he don't let his blackness sneak up on you. Y'know, if his name was Bob Jones or something, it might take you two or three weeks to realize he black. But as soon as you hear "Barack Obama"...you expect to see a brother with a spear! Just standin' on top of a dead lion! Barack Obama! You expect to see the bass player from the Commodores come out! [sings and mimes playing bass] "Too hot ta trot, now, baby, too hot ta trot, bay-by!" I'm not talkin' about Lionel Richie, I'm talkin' about them shiny niggas behind him!

 

Chris Rock

 

Actually, just look at what Osam- Barack Obama said just yesterday. Barack Obama calling on radicals, jihadists of all different types, to come together in Iraq.

 

Mitt Romney

 

If he wanted, the Barack Obama of today could have a pretty good debate with the Barack Obama of yesterday. They could argue about whether the death penalty is ever appropriate. Whether it makes sense to ban handguns. They might explore their differences on the Patriot Act or parental notification of abortion.

 

Barack Obama

 

President Barack Obama. President Barack Obama. Nope, still can't get used to it. It's literally too good to be true. I must've died in my sleep and am now having an insane fantasy pumped into my head by the Matrix. Any minute now Salma Hayek is going to float through the door with a tray of biscuits and I'll know the game's up.

 

Charlie Brooker

 

War's Over, We Won (No Thanks to Barack Obama) ... If Barack Obama had gotten his way, Iraq would now be in the hands of Islamists, and America’s image would have suffered a crushing blow. He voted to cut off funding for the troops, just when they needed it most, and still refuses to admit he was wrong. Well, he was wrong, and George W. Bush deserves credit for refusing to back down when all around him were losing heart.

 

Charles Foster Johnson