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Zach Galifianakis

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The only time it's ok to yell out 'I have diarrhea' is when you're playing Scrabble...because it's worth a shitload of points.

 
Zach Galifianakis

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The only good time to say I have diarrhea is during a game of Scrabble, because it's worth a shitload of points.

 
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When Pat is saying something outrageous, you know when you yell at the TV? I get to yell at him in person. I get to yell at the TV and it hears me.

 
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"Buy my soda!" said the Moose Diarrhea Salesman. And we did. We all did. But when we got it home and opened up the package, it was not what they said it was. And rather than chucking it all and searching for something better, we're content with looking for another Moose Diarrhea Salesman.

 
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Perspective is worth 80 IQ points.

 
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