I'm as close to retarded as you can get and still live alone, I'll admit that. If there was an island for retarded people, I would be their king. They would be like "he can cut his own meat, he will lead us!"
--
Fired from DennysMitch Fatel
I'm drinking Jack and I started blackin out. You ever black out? Or as I call it, time travel? You ever do that? Oh yeah! You know how it is -- you're drinking, you black out. You wake up, you're in another bar. You're drinking, you black out. You wake up, you're playing that knife game with a half-Indian somewhere in North Dakota, "Yeah! Yeah! Winner fixes the tranny! Yeah". You're drinking, you black out. You wake up, you're in White Castle -- working there 3 years, STILL not assistant manager. Your buddies tell you to quit, but you can't 'cause you're banging the slow girl on the fry-o-later. They say she's a little retarded, but those titties ain't retarded!
Dave Attell
"I got attention by being funny at school, pretending to be retarded, and jumping around with a deformed hand."
Leonardo DiCaprio
Live for today you retarded little shit. The end is near.
Joey Comeau
"I can't help it," I said. "My soul knows my meat is doing bad things, and is embarrassed. But my meat just keeps right on doing bad, dumb things."
"You and your what?" he said.
"My soul and my meat," I said.
"They're separate?" he said.
"I sure hope they are," I said. I laughed. "I would hate to be responsible for what my meat does."Kurt Vonnegut
Fatel, Mitch
Fatiaki, Daniel
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