Friday, December 14, 2018 Text is available under the CC BY-SA 3.0 licence.

Fred Gallagher

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Kimiko: "Besides, I figure if I make the dress real hard to get out of, it'll keep you out of trouble." - ... - "Remind me again... Who has an audition for a voice part in a porn game today?"
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Source: Megatokyo #202

 
Fred Gallagher

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I told him, "We're all gay, buddy. It's just to what extent are you gay." He says, "That's bullshit, man, I ain't gay at all!" I said, "Yes, you are and I'll prove it." He says, "Fine, prove it." I said to him, "All right- do you like porn?" He says, "Yeah, I love porn, you know that." I said, "Do you only watch two women together?" He said, "Naw, I watch a man and a woman make love." I said, "OK, do you want the guy to have a tiny, half-flaccid penis?" He said, "Naw, man, I like big, hard, throbbing co- (stunned pause) ...I did not know that about myself."

 
Ron White
 

"What I would like to know is what I should be doing."
"I see what you mean," Freeling said, "but I'm afraid I can't tell you. If you were a lathe operator I'd say make that part, but you're a part of management, and you can't treat managerial people that way."
"Go ahead," Forlesen told him. "I won't mind."
[...] "What I meant was that if I knew what you ought to be doing I'd hire a clerk to do it. You're where you are because we feel—rightly or wrongly—that you can find your own work, recognize it when you see it, and do it or get somebody else to. Just make damn sure you don't step on anybody's toes while you're doing it, and don't make more trouble than you fix. [...] Don't come running to me with complaints, and don't let me get any complaints about you. Now what was it you wanted to see me about?"
"I don't," Forlesen said. "You said you wanted to see me."
"Oh. Well, I'm through."

 
Gene Wolfe
 

HUH?
Did I say "more"? Re-read my e-mail, Einstein. I said the game "helped cause the death." Where is the word "MORE" in my email? Can you gamers read carefully, or not?
The game was part of the causal mix. You guys never think anything bad could possibly come from a game. That is a bizarre blindspot in all of your thinking.
They were playing a game that makes that type of gunplay appear fun and consequence-free. If you can't figure out the causal relationship, then there's the proof your frontal lobes are fried by the games. Jack Thompson

 
Jack Thompson
 

Kimiko: "I've been a klutz all evening. I don't know what's wrong with me."
Megumi: "That's easy. You're a little 'unbalanced'."
"Aaaaagh!!!! Oh my god how embarrassing! That does it! I'm not wearing these things anymore."
"Oh... you poor girl. You really do need them, don't you?"
"Don't be such a meanie..."

 
Fred Gallagher
 

"You want a pig," said Roger, "like in a real hunt."
"Or someone to pretend," said Jack. "You could get someone to dress up as a pig and then he could act — you know, pretend to knock me over and all that —"
"You want a real pig," said Robert, still caressing his rump, "because you've got to kill him."
"Use a littlun," said Jack, and everybody laughed.

 
William Golding
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