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Emil Cioran

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For two thousand years, Jesus has revenged himself on us for not having died on a sofa.

 
Emil Cioran

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I think that if I’m still here in ten thousand years, I’m going to be crazy as hell. Ten thousand years, pal! Ten thousand years ago, the state-of-the-art was a goat. You really think you’re going to be anything recognizably human in a hundred centuries?

 
Cory Doctorow
 

In titling this work The Second Coming of Christ, I am not referring to a literal return of Jesus to earth. He came two thousand years ago and, after imparting a universal path to God's kingdom, was crucified and resurrected; his reappearance to the masses now is not necessary for the fulfillment of his teachings. What is necessary is for the cosmic wisdom and divine perception of Jesus to speak again through each one's own experience and understanding of the infinite Christ Consciousness that was incarnate in Jesus. That will be his true Second Coming.

 
Paramahansa Yogananda
 

The words of the Bible that you believe in today are the words of a betrayed Jesus. The apostles betrayed not only Jesus but also his words. His words were betrayed and Jesus was also personally betrayed. Did Heaven labor for four thousand years to establish Jesus just so he might be betrayed? No, not at all. Why do you believe in Jesus? You must believe in Jesus in order to fulfill the hope of God and to ease the pain of Jesus. Without caring whether you go to Heaven or hell and even if you go to hell, you should fulfill Jesus' hope. Even if you become the prince of hell, you should believe in order to fulfill God's hope. But people say, "Even if Jesus perishes and Heaven fails, all that needs to happen is that I go to the Kingdom of Heaven." This attitude is worse than criminal. This kind of faith is faulty in essence. Today the road of the Unification Church members is the road of setting this kind of Christianity straight.

 
Sun Myung Moon
 

And going for the clincher, a girl cries out in vain
How Jesus lived 6 years longer than Kurt Cobain
And Jesus' hair was longer, and Jesus' arms were stonger
And Jesus's eyes were bluer, and Jesus' thoughts were truer.

 
Kurt Donald Cobain
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