Thursday, April 25, 2024 Text is available under the CC BY-SA 3.0 licence.

Dane Cook

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I saw this on CNN a few days ago. In New York these cops freaked out. They shot at this guy 15 times 'cause they thought he was holding a grenade. HE WAS EATING A PEAR!! How do you f**k that up?! Unless he was eating it like "AHHHHHH!" *throws pear* "THAT'S A DELICIOUS PEAR!!!"
--
Track 7, " Fireman & Policeman & Miniature Golf Course Security Guard "

 
Dane Cook

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